Tuesday, May 23, 2017

The Adventures of Miz, Goldust, and Big Show: The Yard Episode

The Miz, Goldust, and Big Show are backstage at a show. And they see Dean Ambrose walk in. Big Show starts to pick a fight with Dean Ambrose. Dean walked into Big Show.

Big Show: Dean you should watch where you are going.

Miz added: Yeah Dean.

Goldust attacked Dean from behind as the Drifter just played on.

The Big Show choke slammed Dean Ambrose and Goldust gave Dean the shattered dreams. The Miz was just taunting him.

Dean was in pain and said I want all three. I want all three.

Dean went in the trainers room and Kurt Angle walked in.

Kurt Angle: Dean I heard you got beat up. How are you.

Dean; I don't care. I will take on all three of them.

Kurt Angle: Dean, I will not let you take on all three at the same time, but if you could find two tag team partners and I know they are available, you can have that match tonight.

Dean: I know who to ask.

The Drifter started to play.

Dean: Definitely not you, I mean you could even open for Volbeat, what makes you think you could sing in the WWE.

The Drifter just grunted.

Dean walks out limping holding his genital region after shattered dreams said. : Hey Seth I know we had our issues and I know that I beat you for the World Title, but is it possible we could team against The Golden Era.

Seth Rollins: Hey Dean no offense we are competing against guys like Samoa Joe or Finn Balor. We are not delegated to feud with the Miz. What's in it for me.

Dean: I handle your Samoa Joe problems, just handle my Drifter problems.

Seth: Ok Dean, but I think you are still out of your mind.

Dean: You know there is one more person that I have to ask

Seth: Roman Reigns.

Before they get there Dean is doing a 10 Minute Promo on himself.

Roman to himself posing: This is my Yard. No one will take My Yard this is My Yard. I live in my Yard. I wrestle in my Yard. I pee in MY Yard. This is my Yard.

Roman kept going.

Dean and Seth walk in.

Roman: This is my Yard.

Seth: Ok Roman calm down.

Roman: But this is my Yard.

Dean: Only Yard I know is a yard a dog pee's in. Do you pee in your yard are you The Dog from WCW.

Roman: This is my Yard. (Grunting)

Dean: Ok Roman somebody is trying to trash your yard and they are Goldust, Miz, and Big Show. I think leuding in some kind of way.

Roman: But this is my YARD.NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Seth: It's ok Roman you can team with us and save your Yard. For us. Bring back The Shield once more.

Roman: On one condition. You help me deal with Braun.

Seth: Isn't he injured.

Roman: I don't care. He is not welcome in my Yard.

Dean: Who is?

Roman Reigns: Pulls out a Rabbit. This guy right here. He is welcome in my Yard.

Dean: I think he is one fry short of a happy meal Seth.

Seth: Isn't that what they said about you.

They left to prepare for their match just like that The Shield was back together. And Miz would be up to his tricks next week now they were easy to pull.

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

The Adventures of The Miz, Big Show and Goldust: The Table for 3

This is fictious, but some is based on fact. This could be a serious one, but it will build the bond in this one. Enjoy reading.

Vince being Vince paired up The Miz up with Breezango, but The Miz who didn't like his tag team he was paired up with didn't know that Goldust had friction with his team. And little did the know chaos would happen in the match.

Goldust and R Truth had been fighting through the match and then he turned on him and Dean and then The Miz turned on Breezango and sold him down the river Goldust started to help The Miz out. They had a lot in common. Both had portrayed themselves to be stars and they just clicked.

Just as tag teams some have to end and The Golden Truth was no more. It was up there with when the Rockers broke up. Just as things happen.

Goldust had resentment over that part of his character. He was humiliated he had to be the joke much like Big Show. He was talented and The Miz, Goldust, and The Big Show formed a bond and a faction.

They didn't want to be jokes anymore. They didn't want to be laughed at they wanted to be taken seriously. The three had this dialogue in Table for 3 and it sparked a unit as a stable.

Eating Dinner.

Big Show: This is good food what is it?

Goldust: Some kind of beef, I don't know.

The Miz: Why is everyone so down.

Big Show: It is our end of our careers and we are still consider jokes for what we do and we are reminded. We are truly not at our potential.

Goldust: I know how you feel, I nearly lost a relationship with my Dad over my gimmick.

The Miz: (Breaks out of Kay Fabe) That had to have been tough. I know I was played to be this obnoxious character, but I fell off the ladder to and when you get older, newer stars come and it is tougher to stay relevent.

Big Show: Yeah, I have a lot of respect for Dusty. He got me started. He taught me to make anything work and I took a lot from him.

The Miz: Tell us about your character Goldust. What really irks you about it.

Goldust. When I was a fan growing up I watched older wrestling and I heard about the likes of Gorgeous George. He wasn't gay, but he put out an outlandish gimmick and was hated. And then Adrian Adonis, but he was ruined after awhile. These characters were my favorite. They pioneered the sport of wrestling. I wanted to be that character to be racy and as a kid I acted. However, I didn't see the damage that it would do to my family and my relationship with my dad whom I respected. It was only years later that we patched things up. I still miss him. He was one of a kind.

It was only years later I would realize that I didn't have to do the gimmick it just stuck. But as many things I would never break the glass ceiling and become champion based on how I was perceived. The did this with Billy and Chuck, They are doing this with Breezango, They are talented, but they get catogorized and labeled. I was labeled as gay or weird after awhile and this hurts if you want to be champion.

The Miz: I broke the ceiling once.

Goldust: How did you do that?

The Miz: It wasn't easy. I did what I had to do the talent pool wasn't like it was now and they took a chance on a midcarder as they are taking a chance on Jinder now. And I became champ and I had my WrestleMania moment as I beat John Cena. Then a few weeks later I wasn't champion and someone else was and I was midcard it was tough to rise again and break the ceiling. It isn't easy.

Big Show: I came from WCW to WWE and I was inserted in the Main Event picture,but shortly after my role fell and I fell underneath the glass ceiling and was made fun of for what I did. I tried to make people laugh, but they only made fun of me. It is hard being a Giant. Andre went through the same thing, but Andre had the It factor. They wanted me to be like Andre, but I was the Big Show. I tried to poke fun at myself, but I have maybe a run or two left. I know I will be back in the picture but it gets difficult when you are older. Look at Taker.

Goldust: Another great who hung it up.

The Miz: I guess growing old is tough for the wrestler.

Big Show: When they hang it up.

Goldust: When we hang it up.

The Miz: We have to keep fighting on.

Goldust: That is like life.

The Miz: Hey how about lets be a faction, we have a lot in common.

Big Show: We would have to get it past Vince.

Goldust: We would be The Golden Show. Just like on the Cinema in the olden days and it would be the Goldust character that I wanted to be, not what I was.

Big Show: Same here Goldie. Same here.

The Miz: Let's not be down. This is just the beginning of something good.

Big Show: Or terrible, It all depends.

They ended the Table for 3 with some kind of bond and they were going to travel to Chicago where they would feud with Dean Ambrose and whomever.

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

The Adventures of The Miz and Maryse: WWE Backstage Meeting.

In this fictitious episodic series for as long as this can go. The Miz, Maryse, Kurt Angle, Dean Ambrose, and for some odd reason Brutus Beefcake arrived at the arena and Vince McMahon called a meeting of the talent before the show.

Vince McMahon look around the room and spoke: We are going to have a good show tonight just follow the cues. Roman your going to go over on Braun tonight. They are going to hate you, but feed into it. It will be a heel turn down the road and we are building it up. Big Show you are going to be in a Handicap match against Rhyno and Heath Slater and you are going over it will make you look stronger going into your match against Roman next week setting up the feud. Then he saw Brutus.

Turned to Brutus: What are you doing here Brutus? Are you no longer employed in this company. (Vince getting Vince) Shouldn't you be in the stands it's not legends night.

Dean Ambrose: Actually he is with me.

Vince: I write the script not you Dean.

Dean actually it got approved by the GM Kurt Angle.

Vince: Kurt you have explaining to do? Why is Brutus here?

GM Kurt Angle: Well Boss it's a funny story. Brutus was at Hogan's house and he was in The Miz's car, they wound taking him on a road trip and then Dean and The Miz got in drag race, Dean's car broke down around Pittsburgh and they started to drive and they picked me. Funny story.

Vince: But why is Brutus here?

The Miz: Eh Tu Bruti. Eh Tu Bruti.

Finlay: (In an Irish accent.) Isn't that what Caesar said to Brutus before he killed him.

Dean Ambrose: In the Miz's case they were making Caesar salad.

Vince: Hey Brutus why are you here and why is The Miz dressing in drag does he have a fetish. Good idea The Miz that is your newest gimmick you will team with Breezango.

The Miz: But Boss they are to weird for me they will detect areas on me I don't want detected. Only Maryse can do that.

Fandango: This is Funnnndaaannnggoo, Exxxxxaaaaccctttllllyyy MIIIIIIIZZZZZZZ.

The Miz: I feel like The Mountie going to Jail on one of the Pay Per Views in the 90's

Look who is backstage in Ohio it's Jerry Seinfeld. (Camera is rolling)

Jerry Seinfeld: I think this whole scene looks gay. Not that there is anything wrong with it.

The Miz: Are you insinuating that I am gay Jerry.

Jerry: I wasn't insinuating anything.

Wrestlers holding The Miz back and said: Let me tell you something you has been never was comedian you think you can out joke me your jokes weren't good then and they aren't good now. And I'll tell you what I think and I'll tell you what jokes are funny.

Jerry: It looks like you are getting agitated I guess you are gay: Not that there is anything wrong with it.

At this point The Miz goes ape shit and loses it.

Darren Young walks in to calm The Miz down real life person who has dealt with struggles of being a gay professional wrestler and Bob Backlund his coach was with him.

Darren Young: Miz I understand your struggles, I've been through hell I know how you feel buddy. I coped through it with humor it got me through many of times. And I had help through my coach Bob Backlund he has helped me out.

Bob Backlund: We are going to make Darren Young great again.

The Miz: I am not gay.

Seinfeld: Not that there is anything wrong with it.

Bob Backlund: Face your fears Miz. You can do it. It is a brave man to come out and speak what's on your mind. Free yourself.

Maryse: But Miz, is there something you are not telling me.

The Miz: I am not gay Maryse. You have nothing to worry about.

The Miz turns to everyone.: When my hand goes up. Your mouth goes shut. Now you listen to me you no good has been celebrity, old timer, poor excuse of a wrestler and Dean Ambrose. If this is a Rib on me it is not funny. I am not laughing.

Vince: The Miz get control of yourself or you will be off the show. You are leader like it or not and have to work with Breezango. If you don't like it YOURRRRRRRRRREEEEE FIIIIIIIRRRRRREEEEDDD.

Dean Ambrose: How about lets make it a six man tag match I have a tag team that might go against them.

The Miz: Who is that?

Dean: The Golden Truth.

The Miz: Your on Dean. I'll take my team and beat your team.

Episode 4 will be setting up the match of Dean Ambrose and The Golden Truth vs. The Miz and Breezango.

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

The Adventures of The Miz and Maryse: The Tale of Brutus Beefcake and Dean Ambrose

In the tale of The Adventures of the nWo B Team new adventures emerge. It is Adventures of The Miz and Maryse a fictitious episodic series on a Blog for those who really care.

Where we last left off Brutus the Barber Beefcake was in the car going on a road trip to Ohio where The was ready to fight Dean Ambrose in Intercontinental Title on a Poll Match.

Brutus The Barber Beefcake: Hey Miz.

The Miz: What are you doing here? This is my car.

Brutus: I was wondering the same thing. What am I doing here? Could you tell me?

The Miz: I was asking you.

Brutus: You were.

The Miz: Yes.

Brutus: Now I remember. Hogan told me you needed a haircut and a barber.

The Miz: No. Now why would I need a barber?

Maryse: But Miz, You're Hair is kind of long.

The Miz: I have to check with my agents first before anything.

Brutus: I heard you are fighting Dean Ambrose. You need any pointers.

The Miz: Brutus Beefcake, Managed by Lucious Johnny V, Former Tag Team Champion with Greg Valentine, Lost the Tag Titles to the British Bulldogs at WrestleMania 2, Resurfaced again shaving off the head of Adrian Adonis at WrestleMania 3. Had a crappy show on Superstars or Challenge called The Barber Shop. Resurfaced again in WCW as the Booty Man, and Resurfaced hiding his identity as The Disciple and we have never heard from you again. Now why are you in my car Brutus?

Brutus: You know those words hurt and if it was years ago I would beat you senseless and cut your hair, but I am older now and I have taught everything I know to Dean Ambrose. He will use the sleeper hold now. And I have given him my scissors. I will be in his corner when you fight him to make the score even.

The Miz: Are you insane? Giving the Lunatic Fringe a Scissor? Are you crazy?

Brutus: Well I have been hit in the head a few times and I know my brain is more intact then you.

Someone was speeding passing them down the highway. It was Dean Ambrose.

The Miz: WTF.

Maryse: I think it's Dean.

The Miz: Was he trying to lead me into the ditch?

The Miz: Get out Brutus. Just Get Out.

Brutus: But we are in the middle of Pennsylvania.

The Miz: Really. Really.

Dean Ambrose's car breaks down, his engine blew.

He walks in the middle of the night as he spots Miz's car stopped.

Dean Ambrose: Hey Miz, Where are we going?

The Miz: Dean, I am not taking you anywhere is me and Maryse.

Brutus: He is trying to kick me out Dean.

Dean: In the middle of nowhere. I ain't scared of the middle of nowhere. Hey Miz, I got a phone call for you it is from Vince McMahon. Brutus Has the Phone.

The Miz: Really, why would Vince want to speak with me.

Dean: It's urgent. He wasn't happy me waking him up at night, but..

The Miz: But....

Dean: Just answer the Phone.

The Miz answered the Phone.

Jinder Mahal: Who the hell is calling me late? Do you know who I am? I am Jinder Mahal.

The Miz: Jinder I'm sorry.

Jinder Mahal: Your sorry. I'll make you sorry.

The Miz hangs up.

The Miz: Wrong Number Dean.

Dean: But I'm driving your car now Miz.

The Miz: NO

Get in the car Miz and Maryse and Brutus is the front seat.

Dean: Where we going?

The Miz: You know where we are going Dean.

Dean: I don't know I didn't get the memo from WWE.

Dean: Wait I'll call Kurt Angle.

Kurt Angle on the Phone: Who the hell is calling me 3:30 PM in the morning?

Dean: It's Dean. Need a ride to the show. I'm with The Miz, Maryse, and Brutus The Barber Beefcake.

Kurt: Whose car are you driving Dean?

Dean: The Miz's.

Kurt: Does he know your driving his car?

Dean: Actually I'm with him right now.

Kurt: Are you out of your freaking mind.

Dean: Actually a little.

Kurt: How close are you to Pittsburgh?

Dean: Actually we are at your house.

Kurt: Your what. (Pause) Sigh...I'll get ready.

Kurt: Dean did you wake up Jinder Mahal? He wasn't happy.

Dean: I know it was funny.

Dean: Miz, Kurt Angle is coming with us.

The Miz: Oh great.

Dean: And he said It's True. It's Damn True.

Kurt: Now you guys behave. I don't want to separate you.

In a weird set up in the car. Dean Ambrose was driving the car. While Maryse was sitting next to him and Kurt Angle was in between The Miz and Brutus The Barber Beefcake.

They arrived at the Arena in Ohio and they all were greeted by Superstars and Personnel.

This is a tale for another episode of the Adventures of The Miz and Maryse.